A SOUTH AFRICAN HELLO

When we greet, I look you in the eyes and say “Hello” or “hi”, depending on the formality of the greeting, because I have nothing to hide.  For me to look down or away while saying, “Good afternoon, pleased to meet you”, would be taken as shifty eyed and lacking in character.

However, in South Africa, when a Zulu is greeting you, or another of his own race, he may be saying, “Sawubona” (hello to one person), but if he looks you in the eye, he would be considered to be cocky or arrogant.  It is considered to be good manners, if he averts his eyes and does not give you a bold look.  When the conversation is well underway, he may then relax enough to look at you directly.  This is customary and considered good manners.

The Boers, or Dutch people of Africa will greet you with a cheerful, “Goeie more, menheer” (Good morning, sir), yet their children act a little differently.  They wait for permission to speak, greet, then get out of the way of adult conversation, as children are still to be seen and not heard in most circles.  It is considered impolite and impertinent if a child were to pipe up with an answer in response to an adult’s statement, unless he or she was directly spoken to.  If the child wishes to speak to an adult, he or she goes to the door and waits, or if already in the room, to the adult’s elbow and waits politely until he or she is granted permission to speak.  This would usually be from the child’s parent or guardian, as they make decisions on behalf of the children.  Wives used to, in earlier days, also defer to their husbands in this manner, and some still do. 

Imagine, however, the considered impertinence of having little American girls around, used to speaking their minds on all subjects and being listened to, to boot!  When asking the adults what they would prefer for dinner, one of us would not think it impertinent to jump the gun, and answer,  “chicken!”  To the chagrin of my parents, this did not make for winning friends and influencing people. However, my siblings and I definitely did not go without attention, albeit the unwelcome kind! But, what a relief it is to know, that this is not how it is in our relationship with God.

The Bible says we must come boldly before the throne of Grace, making our petitions known, then proclaims that we should be like a little child; what does it actually mean?  Do I wait for permission to speak, or just say it?  This is so confusing—until we understand that we can do all of these things, concurrently.  We may react as spontaneously as a child, but boldly and unabashedly say with the little song, “It’s me again, Lord, I’ve got a prayer that needs an answer; it’s me again, Lord, I’ve got a problem I can’t solve.  I don’t mean to bother you, but here I am facing something new, and I need help that only comes from you, it’s me again Lord”. 

I am both His bride and his child; He is both my husband and my father.  In both instances, he delights to know that I seek out his company.  I respect Him and hold him in the highest regard, yet I am allowed to jump on his lap for a hug.  He will love me, spontaneously, listening for my praise and answering my questions. 

At sunrise, I will look out my window, and, instead of saying, “Good Lord, it’s morning!” I will say, “Good morning, Lord, and listen, politely, for his still, small voice.”